This post is a nod and recognition to my family for their support. I write this in the middle of a 4 month winter lockdown in the UK. A time when families are stretched, stressed and doing their best to not take lumps out of each other.
While professional support such as physio has been essential to help me get back on my feet and even train for this challenge, the support of those nearest to me has been critical.
Time...
For those who don't know me, I lead a busy life. I have two kids (8 and 13), a wife who also works a stressful job (secondary school teacher) and a 1 year old cocker spaniel who is both beautiful but crazy. I also have a busy job that can lead to long days and high stress. On top of this I'm an avid technical trader for a hobby/investment in a very volatile market that runs 24x7x365. All of which commits a huge amount of time and energy for both me and them.
My day typically starts at 6am and doesn't stop until 6pm. By the time I've added on training, eating and bedtime for my youngest, it doesn't finish until 8.30. Basically I get an hour a day respite during the weekdays, often which I'm stretching or rolling out issues I have from training, etc..
This means I have to find solutions on how to manage my time. And I can't do that alone. I lose most of a day at the weekends from my long runs which, by the time I've taped up, prepped my pack, put my gear on, ran, and warmed up/down, can easily take up 6 hours+.
I'm lucky to have support. The kids understand and accept what I'm doing and my wife has been brilliant. It's a big undertaking for everyone. I eat differently, which means we have to cook differently. It also means we have to shop differently for me. All of which takes extra time and effort. Everyone get less time with me at the moment as well (maybe that's not such a bad thing for them LOL). We have to work around long runs, and sometimes time when I'm away and she has to do it all on her own for a day or two.
What makes the support even more meaningful is that my wife also has long hard days of her own. She trains (in fact is a very good runner and former PT), as well as has her own career and yet doesn't make issue of the time I need to do the extra in order to achieve what I'm working towards.
It could be much worse. It could be much more stressful at home, and I still manage to pull my weight (albeit slowly when I'm feeling really sore) with chores. But the time is there to be created if we are prepared to spend less time sat on a sofa, and if you work as a team with those around you.
I just wanted to put this out there that I recognise that everyone is making sacrifices right now to enable me to do what I need to. They have to watch me hobble around in pain, or see me at low ebb because I'm shattered. They get less 'treats' because the shopping basket is much lighter on some of the comfort food I'd normally buy.
The questions over the numbers of running shoes you have, or amount of kit you buy are going to be there as well. Just be honest about what you need and why. I'm really grateful for that understanding and support, and it is always appreciated, so thank you.
How to get those around you to support you
There's no secret to it other than to be honest from the start. Tell everyone why it's important to you, ask them for what you will need by way of support, and give them an idea on what that might look like.
Also, show up when you are free to. Be interested in what they are doing or going through (kids and partners). You become less available to them, so it's important to take a little time each day to be interested in their worlds, as it's easy to become fixated on yours. Play with them, talk to them and listen to them. It matters.
Lastly, play with your dog if you have one. They need attention from you and are great therapy.
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